Elliot Jack Baird

My name is Megan and I lost my baby boy, Elliot Jack, at 39 weeks + 4 days on 10 October 2008.

I had a reasonably normal pregnancy, a few complications very early on relating to my due date but
everything went to plan after about 8 weeks. I saw my consultant on a regular basis due to a cyst
that had been found on one of my ovaries at a scan I had at 4 weeks (when they thought I was 12
weeks!) and a history of gestational diabetes in my family.

I woke up on the morning that we found out that Elliot had passed away and had a bath, then realised
that I had not felt him move at all that morning which was very unusual as he was very active
throughout my pregnancy and the night before, but I put it down to him settling down in time for
labour. I still had not felt him move when my husband came home for lunch, but again, we put it down
to him settling down.

I decided to have an afternoon nap, and woke at 5pm having still felt no movement. I decided to
phone the labour ward as I was starting to worry, and they said to come in so they could check me.

My husband picked me up and I texted my Mum to tell her what was happening but told her it was
probably nothing to worry about.

We arrived at the labour ward and they immediately took me into a room and tried to find a
heartbeat, which they couldn't. There was a consultant on the ward at the time who they called, she
came in and carried out an ultrasound scan. It was at that point that we were told that our baby had
passed away.

That moment was the worst moment of my life. I jumped off the bed, still covered in the gel they use
for ultrasound scans and broke down in my husband's arms, who was also sobbing. I immediately wanted
to know if I could have a caesarean but the consultant said they would recommend against it, but if
it was really what I wanted to do then they wouldn't stop me.

My husband and I were left alone while we phoned our families and told them the bad news. We were
both distraught but I managed to make the decision to go through a normal delivery. I was told that
I would have to take some tablets for the next 2 days to soften my cervix and promote natural
labour, and would have to go in on the Monday morning to be induced if labour had not started.

We arrived home and all our families were at our house. I found it so hard to walk in and see
everyone as I felt like I had failed them all. They were all very supportive and looking back, I'm
so glad that they were all there.

We went back to hospital on the Saturday and Sunday mornings so I could take the tablets, and as
labour had still not started, we went in on Monday morning, which was my due date, to be induced.

Firstly, I was given the induction medication where they give you 4 tablets all in one go
internally, and then 5 orally, and as those didn't work, I was given a different type of medication
where all 5 doses are given internally the next day.

Labour had still not started on the Wednesday morning, so they broke my waters to see if anything
happened, which it didn't, so they put me on a drip to start labour at 3.30pm. My contractions
started 10 minutes later and were coming 3 minutes apart straight away. I was taking gas and air to
help with the pain which did not help at all and only made me sick after every contraction so I
decided to have a shot of morphine which also did no good. At 8.30pm I was given an epidural which
was the best thing I have ever experienced.

My husband and I slept from 9.30pm until around 1.30am when I was told I was ready to give birth.

I gave birth to my beautiful baby boy at 2.25am on Thursday 16 October 2008. He weighed 9lb 4oz and
was the most gorgeous thing I have ever seen.

The labour ward were fantastic and allowed our families into the ward to see us as soon as Elliot
was born, and they spent a few hours with us until I was too tired to stay awake.

We kept Elliot in the room with us overnight and had a naming ceremony for him the next morning by
the hospital chaplain. We had decided that we wanted to have a burial for Elliot due to religious
reasons and the hospital chaplain agreed to carry out the ceremony for us.

I had a bath and was discharged at 1pm on the Thursday afternoon. It was so hard coming home and
seeing all the things that we had bought for Elliot, moses basket, pram etc.

We got straight into organising Elliot's funeral which was arranged for the following Friday, 24
October. The funeral director was fantastic and gave us everything we wanted for our boy.

My husband carried Elliot into the chapel at his funeral and from the chapel to the graveside which
was heartbreaking to see but I am still so proud of him as he felt he owed it to our baby.

No cause was ever found for Elliot's death so we have put it down to one of life's mysteries.

We have decided to start trying for Baby Number 2 straight away. A lot of people may think that we
are trying to replace Elliot, but this is not the case. We simply want to have what we were denied
the first time.